Let’s grab a coffee. Okay, we’re having a coffee now.
-I would be into that, totally. I’d ask the gnome to visit my mom. A magic gnome that looks exactly like a newborn child. Specifically, like me when I had just been born. But with the ability to balance its upper body above its fumbly-looking legs. Quite an impressive view, if one is under the impression that they’re looking at a walking newborn.
The magic gnome makes its way over to the back-door of my childhood-home. Where it’s usually filled with four people, the gnome finds only one; my mother. In the absence of her family, she is practicing the saxophone. She has been mastering this instrument throughout her life thus far, although one mustn’t assume her to be a jazz-player or a composer or such. My mother masters the repertoire of countless orchestras and bigbands she has been a part of. As the magic gnome enters my childhood home, she plays The Girl from Ipanema.
The gnome would offer her a wish and she’d wish for world peace.
She’d think that the gnome and her agreed completely on what that means. She’d think that we’d all agree. Trust the gnome. Trust each other. Trust the gnome because it looks like me when I had just come into existence. I don’t think I could imagine anyone more trustworthy than me when I was a newborn. My mom would trust me to understand what she was wishing for. She’d trust the gnome.
My mom is happy. I’d like to think that she’d describe herself as happy. The gnome could give her a wish and after world peace she’d wish for (!) nothing.
I want to know what she would have painted if she were a painter. I’d make the gnome ask her what she wished she could paint and she’d say she didn’t want to paint anything at all.
My mom wouldn’t want to paint anything she’d wish for nothing at all and I would wish for her to want to paint something and then for me to know what she’d want to paint. But first world peace. Always ask for world peace first.
Let’s grab a coffee. Okay, we’re having a coffee now.
Let’s talk Hanna. Have I told you about the spiritual journey she is on? She got visited by a gnome last week! A magical gnome visited her last week. She told me; “A magical gnome visited me last week and offered me three wishes. So of course I wished for world peace-” and ofcourse she wished for world peace, what else would you wish for? A station wagon? She is not that superficial. Anyway, “So of course I wished for world peace, everybody knows that you're supposed to wish for world peace!”. And I start to wonder if she is trying to frame this as if that’s really selfless of her? Is Hanna selfless because she didn’t wish for a station wagon? Imagine! If she wished for a car she would be lynched.
“But then the magical gnome made world peace happen. And I realized, oh my god, what even is world peace? Do the gnome and I agree on what world peace means?”. I told her that she should have wished for the downfall of capitalism. I think the downfall of capitalism would very quickly result in world peace. “So for my second wish, I asked for the downfall of capitalism. That felt only logical”. And I agree with Hanna, that was the only logical option. And now everyone is like; “Hanna ended war and inequality!”, which is true, but wouldn’t anyone in her situation? We all know you should always ask for world peace. My mom got a visit from a magical gnome once, and she wished for world peace. After that she wished for me to be happy. That’s true selflessness.
Let’s grab a coffee. Okay, we’re having a coffee now.
Fine, I want a station wagon. I mean I’d be happy if we got a Volvo station wagon. I just don’t want a new SUV. They make me depressed.